The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
whose parrot is this?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize