I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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