It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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