no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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