It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize