Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
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