I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize