well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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