Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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