Ambien. No doubt about it.
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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