If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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