My first STD was from a foam party
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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