ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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