Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Randomize