is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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