She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
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Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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