Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize