i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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