WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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