Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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