I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize