I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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