D3 body, D1 cock
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize