Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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