five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
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