Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
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Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
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These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
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