You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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