from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize