I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize