I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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