Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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