I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
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