I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
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I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
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The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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