there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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