well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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