the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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