I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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