Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
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The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
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And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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