Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I pour the whiskey from now on
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Randomize