we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
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I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
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I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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