No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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