How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize