am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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