I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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