Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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