So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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