when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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