i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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