Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
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had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
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Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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