Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize